My Miracles
My life has been filled with miracles starting with the birth of my children. Their births were absolutely my two most significant miracles.
After that, my greatest miracle occurred after my children’s teen-age years. Looking back, I am acutely aware of how difficult those years were. In recalling the 50’s and the confusing, uncontrolled life-changing 60’s, I realize how traumatic that period was for me. (I now realize that it was also traumatic for my children).
My background of moral values . . . of parental, teacher, and family respect as well as respect for authority . . . was abruptly disappearing, while my simple uncomplicated sense of right and wrong fought to stay alive. The children also fought to defend their new world of drugs, sexual revolution and resistance to authority. I lived with the constant fear that Bruce and Robin could be hurt or even killed by the drugs that they hid so well from me.
As for the sexual behavior, it was my daughter that concerned me. I was raised with the notion that the male was free to do as he pleased but the female needed to remain chaste and pure. That was written in stone and embellished by constant parental reminders, and I believed it. So I was shocked to learn that mothers took their daughters to the doctor for birth control medication. That meant they were giving their approval for their daughters to engage in sexual behavior. “How could they do that?” I asked my puzzled mind. “No intelligent man will ever want to marry girls who are not virgins.” I forgot that was only true during my unmarried years.
I realize now that in many ways, I was wrong. In many ways, they were also wrong. What I didn’t adjust to was the fact that it really was their world and no longer mine. I defended my values while they were adjusting to theirs, and each of us made mistakes. The mistakes I made during that period are the ones I regret the most, the ones that I now know could have been handled more logically with more understanding and less emotion.
The miracle of that period is that we all survived. That truly is a miracle . . . a miracle that includes each of us going on to a time where we truly love and respect each other.
After that, my greatest miracle occurred after my children’s teen-age years. Looking back, I am acutely aware of how difficult those years were. In recalling the 50’s and the confusing, uncontrolled life-changing 60’s, I realize how traumatic that period was for me. (I now realize that it was also traumatic for my children).
My background of moral values . . . of parental, teacher, and family respect as well as respect for authority . . . was abruptly disappearing, while my simple uncomplicated sense of right and wrong fought to stay alive. The children also fought to defend their new world of drugs, sexual revolution and resistance to authority. I lived with the constant fear that Bruce and Robin could be hurt or even killed by the drugs that they hid so well from me.
As for the sexual behavior, it was my daughter that concerned me. I was raised with the notion that the male was free to do as he pleased but the female needed to remain chaste and pure. That was written in stone and embellished by constant parental reminders, and I believed it. So I was shocked to learn that mothers took their daughters to the doctor for birth control medication. That meant they were giving their approval for their daughters to engage in sexual behavior. “How could they do that?” I asked my puzzled mind. “No intelligent man will ever want to marry girls who are not virgins.” I forgot that was only true during my unmarried years.
I realize now that in many ways, I was wrong. In many ways, they were also wrong. What I didn’t adjust to was the fact that it really was their world and no longer mine. I defended my values while they were adjusting to theirs, and each of us made mistakes. The mistakes I made during that period are the ones I regret the most, the ones that I now know could have been handled more logically with more understanding and less emotion.
The miracle of that period is that we all survived. That truly is a miracle . . . a miracle that includes each of us going on to a time where we truly love and respect each other.
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